Feline Frustrations & More

After a few months of encountering cats on a regular basis I can say with certainty that I don't like them. I might even hate them. I don't really want to see cats die. I would never kill a cat. I just would rather them stay away from me and my life and my stuff. The hair is the biggest problem. They seem to know how much I hate the hair when they decide to rub their faces and bodies all over my clothes. Besides the hair is their whining, their pouncing...they take dumps in the house. That's so gross. The first cat I knew regularly was Andrew's cat, Falco. Falco's pretty cool. If I didn't dislike his kind I would probably be okay with him. He doesn't seem needy or prissy/pissy like other cats, which I like. He's just too loud for me and seeks affection for the purpose of getting food. I suppose it's survival. The other cat in my life is Porch. My roommate's friend's cat. She's watching Porch while her friend is living abroad. Porch seems needy to me. She follows me all around the apartment and meows in a weird crackle because she was in a fight. She rubs her fur all over the carpet so everything that touches the floor is tainted. She lays down in my room and won't leave and she watches my hamster from underneath the clear glass tank. Right now I am caring for her because my roommate is out of town. This cat vomits too much. Today it vomited on my wicker table. I don't think cat barf comes out of wicker. I am being somewhat dramatic. Cats aren't my tragedy, they're just a nuisance.

I can stop complaining soon because I am moving this week! I found a new place close to my old house in North Campus. The apartment is TINY--an efficiency with a miniscule kitchen and airplane style bathroom. I am excited about the giant closet. I will cram my life into that closet so that the rest of the apartment seems bigger. As excited as I am, I think I might miss this location. I'll definitely be glad to be closer to UT/downtown/friends, but the place I live now is no more than 15 minutes away from anywhere I need to go.

Last week I joined a yoga studio. It's pretty yuppie/fancy/Austin-y, but I like it. I really missed doing yoga. It had been more than a year since I'd practiced. I took it for four years (off and on) at UT. It was definitely a great deal, but the classes were really huge and some of the instructors were too almighty about their own yoga agendas. This studio is really small. I've gone to two classes. The first one had three people, the one today only had two. It's so personalized. I enjoy the fanciness because I'm used to being really cheap about everything. This is one "reward" I am allowing myself because I know it's something I truly enjoy doing. Today was a problem, though. Last week and over the weekend I was SO SORE because it had been so long since I'd practiced. I fully expected the soreness and dealt with it the best I could. Everything started feeling better except this one spot on my shoulders. Specifically the left shoulder. Today I assumed I could just stretch it all away and "work out" the shoulder problem. Not the case. As soon as I lowered down into plank I felt the sharp, searing pains through my left shoulder. I almost dropped to the floor because the arm started going limp. I forced myself through the rest of the class, doing tons of Vinyasas--the sequence of poses that causes the shoulder pain. It started getting a little better toward the end, but I think it's because I modified it and was relying almost totally on my right arm. Now I am upset. I am so excited about these classes and I think I've injured myself. It's definitely screwing up my practice. I'm going to keep doing it until my arm completely tears off. At that point I'll believe it's a serious problem and not just my weak body.

Finally, tonight I signed my life savings away to my sister if I should die. She's my primary beneficiary. It's kind of hilarious. Maybe I'll die from blood loss when my arm breaks off from too much yoga.

waco. creation. lease. grays. sick. cut. golden.

Just for the record, I think Waco was a failure. I never got a confirmation that they rejected me, but it's been almost a month since I interviewed. I have to move on.

In the meantime I am trying to create a life that satisfies me. It's like a game. Maintain all areas of my life. Make new opportunities happen. I am joining a yoga studio this week if all goes to plan. It's been about a year since I've done it. I am also planning to start volunteering with the ARC of Central Texas. ARC=Association for Retarded Citizens. I have a background working with people with disabilities so it seems somewhat logical. It's something that I used to enjoy, though I haven't really done much volunteering since I went to college.

Right now I am swept up trying to find a new place to live. My lease here is over September 1, rather, someone else is moving in because I agreed only to live here for a month. I am trying to decide if it's better to live alone or with roommates. I would much rather live alone, but it seems too expensive and rare to find something. Location is sometimes a problem because my job is far away, plus I realized that I don't want to live outside the very inner core of Austin. I am pretty sure I'm going to have to live with multiple roommates. I just hope I can tolerate them.

The stress is getting to me, but in a lesser way than in past eras. My grays are shining away as always. At work sometimes I sit around and pluck them out one-by-one and throw them into the recycling bin. This week is slow because my boss is gone and I have two things to work on. They are not good at keeping my attention. I was so distracted today. I actually almost called in sick this morning because I was sweating profusely and felt dizzy. I couldn't put on my makeup; I had to lay in bed for 10 minutes to calm down. I felt better after I was at work for a couple of hours and then realized I looked like shit. Sometimes it's just like that.

Tomorrow (today?) I cut my hairs. Nothing drastic, but I can't wait to get all the straw off the bottoms of my locks. My hair is so rotten from all the time I spent in the sun and in the water. My hair is curly brown straw with some confused gray spikes in it.

Oh yeah, and Michael Phelps is a great swimmer. Golden boy.

workworkilikeitfornowworkworkwork

I'm living in a box room now. Last week I moved out of the "haunted" place. I don't really have any intention of unpacking since I'm only staying here for a month. Well, less than a month now. I have decided I have two options. It depends on whether I get a job in Waco. I thought I was going to find out by today, but they said it's going to be another week, which further halts any kind of plans I can make. It's okay though, I'm pleased to know I still have a chance at the position. So, if I get the job, I would obviously move to Waco. If I don't get the job (which is probably the more realistic scenario) I am going to try to move somewhere for at least a few months here in Austin. I'm not going to give up on broadcasting because I've only sent out three tapes, but it's probably going to take at least a few months before I send out more tapes, they sit in some ND's office, someone actually calls me, I interview, they take weeks to make a decision, then I would actually move.

My current job is still pleasant. I enjoy it for two reasons, well maybe three...

-I am learning SO MUCH about construction. It's not like I'm passionately interested, but it's just something that I never understood very well, like what's the difference between a contractor and a developer and an architect...at least in the process of making a building. And then all the steps a site goes through before an actual building can be put there. There's also all kinds of engineering projects and stuff. I feel like if I ever come across construction-related stuff in a future journalism job at least I'll have a background so I don't sound like a fool when I'm trying to talk about it.
-I spend a lot of time on the phone calling about things I don't completely understand. It's making me better at handling people over the phone and improvising when I have no idea WTF is going on. Important skill.
-The people I work with are cool. I'm still very much the quiet new person in the office, but I am so glad the people I spend so much time around are interesting to listen to.

Also, we get to listen to music twice a week! There's a little boombox on my side of the office and the head reporter has an iPod filled with a bunch of good music. We all get to pick albums on Tuesdays and Fridays. Today I requested some Magnetic Fields. We've also listened to Of Montreal, Elliott Smith, the Pixies, NIN, Air, Otis Redding...I can't remember it all.

I am beginning to love not being a student. During my two months of bumming before I got a job I was wishing I could still be in school. What's really awesome about just working is that you actually have free time. When I come home, work does not come with me, it stays at my cubicle. Which, BTW, I have decorated according to my tastes. I have a fan from Spain hanging, a little beaded elephant purse from India hanging, a cactus on the desk and some little stone/glass animals...a bird, a stingray and some little pig things of varying sizes.

Today I went outside during my lunch and found some secret benches and a table. I laid on the bench with my knees bent and feet laying flat. I hugged my purse and book. Then I started to fall asleep. I had some weird half awake dreams. At one point I realized I was smiling, then I woke up more and tried to remember what in my dream was so funny, but it was instantly gone. Sleeping/dreaming is so weird. After my nap-ish I felt bad. I think falling into a dreamy sleep in the middle of the day in the sun is a recipe for migraines.

I really want to take some classes. Yoga seems expensive. I want to try to work it into my budget. I am also considering taking a dance class, like maybe Salsa or something. It's all on hold though.

This past weekend I went to my friend's wedding in Laredo. It was so lovely! Of course everything was beautiful appearance-wise, but I think I really liked it because I could tell how happy Mireya and Nick were. I've been to a handful of weddings and the people always look in love, but they looked *especially* connected. Mireya was fabulous! It's probably my favorite wedding dress I've seen on someone. Now they're off on their honeymoon in NYC. Lucky people! I decided that I want to have a wedding, but I'm not sure I want the marriage. I just like the idea of having a big party with lots of traditions and pretty dress and then getting to travel somewhere. My sister and I told my dad awhile ago that we wanted to use our wedding funds to take a trip together. Big dreams.

Goodness, I need to fix this headache.